Top ten reasons the Khawks will win the NLL Championship this season

Discussion in 'Rochester Knighthawks Forum' started by zigzag2k, Dec 7, 2000.

  1. zigzag2k

    zigzag2k New Member

    10. The Toronto Rock will lose all home games because they are too stupid to find the floor at their new arena.

    9. The Philadelpia Wings give up on the season after being shut out by the Knighthawks 27 - 0. Right here in, ...... ROCHESTER NY!

    8. The New York Saints run out of crack to smoke before games.

    7. The Buffalo Bandits find it difficult to breathe with the clothespins on their noses, used to block the putrid smell of the city.

    6. The Washington Power fire Darris Kilgour, and hire Norv Turner

    5. The Columbus Landsharks are forced to cease operations when self respecting players refuse to go to Ohio.

    4. Ottawa Rebels = Syracuse Smash = 0-14

    3. Theres a team in Albany?????!!!!!!

    2. The Knighthawks rule!!!!!!

    And the number one reason the Knighthawks will win the 2001 NLL Championship is......

    1. That crybaby Casey Powell is not playing!!!!!!!

  2. Haftalax

    Haftalax New Member

    <FONT face="Georgia">More Reasons the Knighthawks will Bath in the Cup !!</FONT f>

    10) The Rock do find the floor repeatedly due to checks from Brad MacArthur and Regy Thorpe.

    9) The Philadelphia Wings are discouraged by the pathetic turnout of PWFC members at the season opener and decide to phone it in as usual in Rochester. Rochester wins 17 - 15 !!

    8)The New York Saints keep thinking Sal is in goal and keep dumping the ball to him behind the bench. They do however shatter the record for turnovers without a player being touched.

    7) The Bandits, awh nevermind, their still the Bandits.

    6) The Washington Power's season is forfeited when the President is invited to present the ceremonial first face-off and noone shows up with the ball.

    5) The Columbus Landsharks are locked out of the arena when they try to enter the lockerroom by knocking and saying "CandyGram".

    4) The Ottawa Rebel are sold to a group of 12 year old venture capitalists to prevent the bankruptcy of their parent company.

    3) The Albany Attack are thrown out of their arena when they are found drinking Coca-Cola products in the locker room before the game. Have a Coke and an eviction notice, scrubs !!

    2) The Krew attends every home game and the noteworthy away games to inspire the team to an incredible 13 - 1 season !! ( The team is hijacked crossing the border going to Toronto. The St. Catherine's Golden Girls (over 60 women's lacrosse club) are called to duty in their place and almost win a 16 - 15 double OT shootout)

    1) We want Casey, but Jr., Brad, Dewey,Regy, Mearnsey, O'Toole, Chugger, Rusty, Cory and the Whipples will do just nicely.

    Go ahead and think that the pre-season scrimmages indicate our talent pool, underestimate us and enjoy your dismay at the final buzzer.

    Backoff, I'm doing the backstroke in the NLL Champion's Cup this year. Make mine a Honey Brown chaser !!

    Da Knabber has spoken, now KISS my NLL Championship ring.

  3. WingsfaninMA

    WingsfaninMA New Member

    Ten Reasons why the Knighthawks won't win the Cup

    10. Pat O'Toole

    9. It's hard to recover from a home opening 21-10 loss.

    8. Rochester gets snowed in, forcing Knighthawks to forfeit entire season.

    7. Teal clashes with the red in the cup.

    6. Columbus has better defense.

    5. Ottawa Rebel don't have to go to Rochester, so there goes the free win.

    4. They'll finish third or fourth, as always, and have to go on the road in the playoffs.

    3. Pat O'Toole

    2. The road to the title will come through Philadelphia.

    1. Only one team can win the cup a year, and the Wings are going to win in 2001.
    smurf666 likes this.
  4. raphilly

    raphilly New Member

    <FONT face="arial">Ten more reasons why the Knighthawks will be crying after the title game (with apologies to the recent election):

    [Important notice -- the following is satire and should be seen as nothing more... thank you.]

    10. Rock pull an Al Gore and tell K'Hawks, "This Cup never leaves". (

    9. Casey Powell pulls the anti-Gore and never comes back.

    8. Paul Gait pulls a Hillary Clinton and carpetbags his way back onto K'Hawks roster.

    7. Out of a job, willing to commute, and an eight-year veteran of running the national defense, Bill Clinton hired to run Rochester's defense.

    6. Dick Cheney (the REAL expert on national defense) announces that his heart's never been better and moonlights as Philadelphia's defensive coach.

    5. John Grant, Jr. arrested for DUI while with tennis pro in Maine, made to govern a large southern state until the recently-departed governor's term expires in January 2003.

    4. President Bush cracks down on flag desecration, tries to execute Pat O'Toole regarding March 1997 stunt for which he was later exonerated. (uh oh, I may hear it for that one, although in looking for crime allegedly involving NLLers, the only alternative really isn't very funny right now)

    3. Bill Daley and Warren Christopher come to Rochester, declare that Knighthawks will win 2001 NLL Championship.

    2. Al Gore demands that he, and not Paul Day, is the rightfully-elected coach of the Rochester Knighthawks.

    1. Knighthawk fans didn't understand the butterfly ballot used to elect league champion, unwitting voted for the Philadelphia Wings.


    "The best of the NLL sites" - </FONT f>
  5. As Moderator of the Knighthawks Forum I do hereby ban any attached disclaimers to blatantly "tongue-in-cheek" postings.
    All those that don't "get it" will be permanently banned from the internet.

    Most Sincerely,
    Gonzo In Roch

    It's...The Gonzo Page!!!
  6. raphilly

    raphilly New Member

    <FONT face="arial">Now, Gonzo, don't forget which one of us is the moderator and which one is the administrator... as the great Quick Draw might say, "I'll be the one doin' the thin'in' around here, and doooooon't you for-get it!" [​IMG] Besides, better safe than sorry (and better to have folks understand the tone than for them to act like Palm Beach voters and depart this fine board in misplaced anger).

    R.A. (a.k.a. El Kabong)
    The administrator around here -- and doooooon't you for-get it! [​IMG] </FONT f>
  7. RA,

    Do YOU know what "tongue-in-cheek" is?
    You may have to be banned from your own board!! LOL!!

    Most Sincerely,
    Gonzo In Roch

    It's...The Gonzo Page!!!
  8. WingsfaninMA

    WingsfaninMA New Member

    Gonzo 1
    RA 0


    In two weeks,

    Philly 17
    Rochester 9
    smurf666 likes this.
  9. AmericanRockFan

    AmericanRockFan Well-Known Member

    Stopped reading at reason number nine.
  10. chuckster

    chuckster Well-Known Member

    Whatever happened to Knabber and the Krew? Are they still a thing or are they just tied up with smelling their own farts after their team won 3 consecutive Champions Cups? :eek:
    smurf666 likes this.
  11. smurf666

    smurf666 Guest

    Knabber et al. have miraculously survived the lunacy of Krew postgame excesses, and continue to do as they have done for an entire generation.

    They all just quit posting here like many other good folk.
  12. AmericanRockFan

    AmericanRockFan Well-Known Member

    This, and sadly it seems that people like Hollywood42, Wings-4-Life, WingFan23, and myself are the last generation of regular lacrosse posters on here.
  13. chuckster

    chuckster Well-Known Member

    It would be amazing if none of them died of alcohol poisoning given how they used to talk about their drinking and excess. I think at least 2 of them even procreated......
  14. smurf666

    smurf666 Guest

    The Knabbers have a manchild that is 2/3 of the way to being a young adult.....

    Time flies
  15. AmericanRockFan

    AmericanRockFan Well-Known Member

    Tell me about it. I feel like it was a year ago when I spontaneously met about 15-20 members of this board after a game at the Stock in 2012 (such as torrock, trooper, RockFinn, Bacon, Rock Rulz and his wife, and plenty of others).

    Honestly, I used to wish I was around in the lax community more in 2004-2010ish when all of the older folks were younger so I could've experienced the good memories they talk about; that is until I started having my own to reflect on.
  16. dougm

    dougm Well-Known Member

    us wings fan, the loyal loud and proud, are still just that.
  17. swami24

    swami24 Well-Known Member

    Tempis fugit noncumbacum.

    By the time I heard about post games, I was always with the Mrs and Lil Swami. We never did post games..... Well the little girl who I used to hold up in the air so she could high five the people in the row behind us after every goal..... is now 21. So now I can go to post games:D
  18. swami24

    swami24 Well-Known Member

    The list on this thread is a veritable who's who. I used to avoid other teams pages.. ARF, just keep up the faith
  19. smurf666

    smurf666 Guest

    Actually amazingly hard to do if beer is your poison of choice. The Krew Suite parties had rum and whisky/whiskey come out now and then, but, usually, it was just too much beer, way too late into the night/next morning. The volume/bloat factor protects you against serious consequences o_O

    There were a few nights where the hotel bar ran an all night happy hour though......and, if you were ordering liquor, it was a hilarious take on happy hour. Instead of giving you two shots, they gave you a giant shot glass and a 2+ oz belt of whiskey/whisky or white lightning. :eek:

    This stuff is a bit hazy 12 odd years later, but, the one constant memory was that by about 7am, there would be Paddy O'Toole plus the last few other revellers, putting away one last adult beverage before catching a couple of ZZZs before checkout.
  20. Wingsfan23

    Wingsfan23 Member

    The irony of this thread is
    1. The wings took care of the knighthawks in the playoffs
    2. The wings won the 2001 champions cup
    smurf666 likes this.

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